Today wasn't a day I was looking forward to except that I was,in a way. I was booked into Furness General for the day to have my tube removed. Now I've had this alien bit of pipe stuck in my bits for almost three weeks and although it was not comfortable I'ld learned to live with it. However, here I am at 9am full of trepidation at the prospect of having it pulled out. Morning, said Sharon, I'm here to remove your catheter, we''ll do it now should we. I suppose now is as good as any other time. The ward in the day care unit has only me in it so I suppose it won't be too disturbing if I yell out, I thought. Have you done this before, I ask. About 10'000 times says Sharon. Oh well that's reassuring, says I. Ok, take a deep breath, relax, whoosh, that's it, it's out. Really, oh well not too bad, then the pain kicks in, but within seconds has subsided to a dull burning sensation, and its done. I'd been building this moment up to be so much worse than it was and within about a quarter of an hour I felt fine, pains gone and a cup of tea. They gave me a jug of water, and left me to my book, all was quiet still on the ward. I now had to drink and pee when the urge arrived into one of those funny shaped cardboard jug things and place it at the foot of the bed. The nurse arrived to collect, and took it away to measure my volume. The day went slow, but I had a good book to read and every hour or so I would present the nurses with another sample.Each time they came back to fill in my chart, and said good, very good, as my volumes increased, it was encouraging. The ward filled up with more blokes about lunch time getting ready for lots of unpleasant procedures, I'm sure, and the ward became a much more animated place. The bloke in the next bed to me came back from theatre with what sounded a gruesome ordeal. Seemingly, as I overheard the doctor telling him that they'd taken his eye out, put a plate in somewhere and sorted something out. The patient, who I couldn't see had a posh accent, landed gentry, but under the influence of the morphine that was still wearing off, he sounded a bit tipsy. Lucky me I was just tucking into my lunch as this conversation, 3ft away was being played out. Still, I managed to keep the apple crumble down.
At 4pm they came and scanned my bladder, directly after my last pee of the afternoon. Mmm, I've got 226 here and we're usually ok up to 300 but you will have to have another in an hour. Drat, I was sure I was managing ok and looking forward to being discharged. More water for you Mr Williams, I think. I was on the last page of my book when the nurse popped her head around the curtain and said, you can go, you've got the all clear.
Such sweet words to my ear, I found my mobile, called Jackie and half an hour later we're on our way back home. The dreaded catheter now just a memory, although I'm going to have a bit of leakage and will have to have some discreet male pads to deal with this temporary embarrassing bodily function it should right itself in a short while, so they say. But it soooooooooooo good to be free of that plumbing, and I'm well on the road to recovery now I feel. Just another few weeks and it will all be just a memory of an adventure that was not at all pleasant but something that I had to endure. I will have to wait until Feb 28th to get the all clear but I'm sure the NHS has done a great job, thanks to all for my excellent care, and good humour throughout.
At 4pm they came and scanned my bladder, directly after my last pee of the afternoon. Mmm, I've got 226 here and we're usually ok up to 300 but you will have to have another in an hour. Drat, I was sure I was managing ok and looking forward to being discharged. More water for you Mr Williams, I think. I was on the last page of my book when the nurse popped her head around the curtain and said, you can go, you've got the all clear.
Such sweet words to my ear, I found my mobile, called Jackie and half an hour later we're on our way back home. The dreaded catheter now just a memory, although I'm going to have a bit of leakage and will have to have some discreet male pads to deal with this temporary embarrassing bodily function it should right itself in a short while, so they say. But it soooooooooooo good to be free of that plumbing, and I'm well on the road to recovery now I feel. Just another few weeks and it will all be just a memory of an adventure that was not at all pleasant but something that I had to endure. I will have to wait until Feb 28th to get the all clear but I'm sure the NHS has done a great job, thanks to all for my excellent care, and good humour throughout.
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